TRAILER REVIEW: The Guardian's: The Owls of Ga'Hoole

The man behind the Dawn of the Dead remake, 300 and Watchmen is now heading for the skies in this new animated adventure that deals with owls. Everytime I see this trailer is makes me think of The Goonies. Now I'm not saying that it looks better than the Goonies; only that the sense of adventure and discovery that's in The Goonies, is in some ways, recreated in this trailer.

That being said...

Lately more and more fantasy type novels and stories are being adapted. The Harry Potter movie series is finishing up its run and studios I'm sure are clamoring for the next big thing! So far its been failure's all around; Percy Jackson and the Olympians and The Last Airbender.

I don't understand how the Harry Potter movie series, which is also based on a kids/young adult book if you've been living under a rock, can go on for two hours theatrically and have you hooked for the entire time and then you have two really great series' in your possession that have Harry Potter and even Star Wars like capabilities and you just short change the story completely!

I actually read a few of the books to Percy Jackson and was really looking forward to seeing the movie cause it brought the Gods into our generation in a new and exciting way. The book was filled with such history about all of the main characters interactions with the Gods and all we got was a cliff notes version of it. I saw The Last Airbender television series after seeing the movie and was immediately saddened that so much of the story was sacrificed to get to an ending that didn't mean anything, when it should. I know not every fantasy type novel or television cartoon has a history as rich as Harry Potter, but these two properties did, and more.

Here's hoping that Guardian's changes some of those things. The trailer opens with the legend of the Guardian's and their place in owls history. Being also based off a children's book, the trailer then shifts and has our young owl heroes out to find these legendary Guardian's, for help. For one, I really hope there is more of a history to these creatures than the voice over in the trailer.

Next we get this really horrific, inspirational, "you can make it to the finish line music", that I think completely shoots the trailer in its foot. The movie is directed by Zack Snyder which you would never known cause for some 'effed up reason his name isn't anywhere in the trailer. Even though Snyder is known for his very hard "R" movies, I think that this movie could benefit from his name being up there in bright lights. But then again, I could understand if the studios are like "we don't wanna give off that this movie is gonna have buckets of blood and action...sooo...take his name off"; fuckers. Aside from my Goonies nostalgia, I really feel or at least hope that Synder has crafted a much more serious and reality based movie than the trailer is showing off. What I mean by reality based is that while all the pretty lights and slow-mo is a Snyder trademark and exciting, I hope that real threats and consequences fall upon our heroes and their Champions.

This movie is also getting an IMAX release as well as a 3D release and the only reason I'm happy for that is because it will be getting Resident Evil: Afterlife out of there. THANK GOD! But I'm not sure yet if I will see it in either format yet. Perhaps the 3D, but IMAX is a little pushing it.

As always my final review will be when the credits roll and house lights go up!

Dueces!
StuntmanBob

Trailer Review: DEVIL

M. Night Shyamalan is back this time as an executive producer and "idea giver" in the new thriller/horror movie, DEVIL. This is the first installment under Shyamalan's self-titled "The Night Chronicles" series. The movie is directed by The Brothers Dowdle, whose most recent credit is the movie Quarantine. I know my fellow film geeks, as a whole, have a wonderful time comparing Shyamalan to George Lucas, but I really think he's super-ceded with this move. I'm sorry sir, I may be one of the few people who liked Lady in the Water, but I think you should concentrate more time on writing and directing, like you actually care about the people who sit down and pay to see your films. Not go throwing around the word Chronicle, every time you come up with an idea and just so happen to have two more that follow.

Its okay Chronicle, I promise to lead a campaign that will save you from having to be fucked by M. Nights title card on screen.

So the trailer opens up with these really striking images of what looks to be the New York City skyline upside down with taglines going across it. If you read my Catfish review you know how I feel about taglines, so we won't go there. It makes it seem like everything that's happening, the interactions and those who get in the elevator is all by chance. But the trailer still has to remind me that "everything happens for a reason"....

...fucking taglines....

Anyway the elevator stops, people start screaming and then we are given a series of images from the movie of all the crazy scenarios that will occur. This brings me to the second highlight of the trailer which is when all these images are happening the sound is drown out and there is this low monotone sound that screeches through the rest till we are given a jump scare. Now I really believe that if Shyamalan's name wasn't all over this movie, audiences would have less of a grudge against it. Yes, it looks like another hapless horror movie thriller, with an idea, that by the end could have more done with it, but doesn't change the fact that the trailer isn't all that bad looking. Its an interesting idea, simple enough, and put in a location that suits its claustrophobic and terrorizing needs; its just the filmmaker its associated with that gives it its bum rap right from the beginning.

In summation, I'm honestly curious to see how this entire movie plays out. Less for Shyamalan, but more for the writer and directors of this movie. See Mr. "Unbreakable" is only credited with a "story by" credit. For those of you who think that "screenplay by" and "story by" are the same thing...they are not, let me clarify.

Screenplay by means that they actually wrote an entire script out.

Story by means that Shyamalan could have done anything from walk into and office and say; "Yo...5 people...Elevator...feel the tension...mmmhmmm..can you feel it? AND THEN BAM ONE OF THE IS DEVIL. Package it, sell it, knick knack, patty whack, give a dog a bone!" Or he could have wrote an outline with some plots points and another writer flushed the rest of it out.

I think the latter is what happened but its fun to wonder.

I haven't seen Quarantine and even though I've heard bad things about it, doesn't change that the movie's main plug is that a news reporter is trapped inside a building and has to get out before horrible things happen to her. The writer of this movie is Brian Nelson, who wrote the script for 30 Days of Night and Hard Candy. Both films take place in one location, but do a whole hell of a lot to make you feel as uncomfortable as possible and bring as much tension to the idea of being trapped into its small, but simple story ideas. I'm going to try and go into this flick with the thought that Shyamalan did nothing more than give creative control over to other talented writers and filmmakers and let them do what he hasn't been able to since Unbreakable; and that is make an M. Night Shyamalan movie.

As always my final review will be when the credits roll and house like come up.


Dueces!
StuntmanBob

Trailer Review: CATFISH

Before you read, just know that this review has a spoiler for the movie District 9.

"Just True"

In recent years the docu-style of filmmaking has returned with movies like Cloverfield, Paranormal Activity, District 9, and in theaters now, The Last Exorcism. Catfish is the next installment in that style of filmmaking. The trailer does a good job at establishing this hapless guy that we are following who is having an online relationship with a girl whose voice, we think we hear and pictures from her Facebook, that we hope are also her.

After the swooning and dirty text messages, his friends who are documenting this series of events, and him decide to drive up to her farm in Michigan and once they get out of the car, the trailer shifts and I'm happy and kinda annoyed at the same time.

Annoyed

"The Final Forty Minutes of this Film will take you on an emotional roller-coaster ride that you won't be able to shake for days". - Chris BumBray Joblo.com

While this quote excited me when I first saw this trailer, it soon made me begin ask; are the last forty minutes of this film all I'm really going to be waiting for? Well... Yes! I think by adding quotes like these to trailers, the advertisement is literally telling me when things will get interesting in the movie! I think it sabotages the film in that your not letting the audience go on this journey and be surprised. I just wish the trailer did something with its already uneasy images to give it that same shift in tone. Instead it lazily relies on a quote.

Take a look at the trailer for District 9. Everyone I talked to said to me that it looked like another variation of a run-of-the-mill "alien invasion" movie; i.e. Independence Day. When in fact, sitting in the theater, you were rudely awakened. Discovering that the movie was more about a man who on the day of his promotion is infected in a way that would change his life forever and question his own treatment of the aliens.

Of course punch words like; "AMAZING", "OUT OF THIS WORLD", and "POWERFUL", were thrown around, as well they should be. But no where did it say in the trailer; "Just fucking wait till you see a scene where (SPOILER WARNING) they unwrap his hand and its an alien hand!, CRAZY!"

I just think for the sake of promotion, quotes like these should be chosen more carefully.

Also, while it won't deter my enjoyment of the movie, I highly question this film's validity in being "Just True". I don't know if any of you have seen the movie The Strangers, but that film was also based on a true story. However, it was later revealed that using that tagline, and I do think its more of a tagline now, was purely for advertisement. Although events depicted in the movie unfortunately do happen. The movie was just a look into those happenings. Which I think is what is happening in Catfish.

Happy

Aside from all that I will be definitely going to see Catfish. From the trailer alone I'm hooked. Get it? YucK YucK! It starts off as one thing, then shifts gears very quickly into something that we know is just bad. I like to see movies like this where the images are not all that clear, there is grain, you see people holding the camera; I just think it gives the movie more of a sense of realism and It will help establish the situation and actions more so.

Also with David Fincher's The Social Network coming to theaters a few weeks later, this movie I hope will crack open some interesting debate about social networking sites and meeting people over the internet.

As always my final review will be when the credits roll and the house lights go up!

Dueces!
StuntmanBob

Production Photos: Resident Evil: Rigor Mortis

A few production photos from the shooting of Resident Evil: Rigor Motis at the 2010 Chicago Comic Con.

Resident Evil: RIGOR MORTIS

While at the Chicago Comic Con, Dorian and I, came upon an epidemic that has slowly sucked the life out of rabid fans everywhere around the world. Here is that epidemic.

Why I liked the Ending of THE LAST EXORCISM

DISCLAIMER: Spoiler-filled!!!!! If you plan on seeing the movie, I'd advise not to read, cause I pretty much give away everything.

So last night my sister and I went to go see The Last Exorcism. I wasn't thinking this movie was going to be anything special so I went in with an open mind to see what I could get out of it. If I had any drive to see this movie at all it was because of the article sticky'd to the front of my Yahoo homepage about people being upset at the ending of this movie. You could say, whether or not I saw it in theaters, my interest was peaked.

The movie is a horror mockumentary about a pastor in Baton Rogue, by the name of Cotton Marcus. Cotton is having problems with his faith and has for a long time since his son was born. Cotton has performed over some 50 odd exorcisms, yet, he believes that demons do not exist and that possession is all in the head. So when Cotton has gone to perform an exorcism he actual rigs the room with effects that are controlled by him to create this elaborate ruse and make it seem like its something out of the movie THE EXORCIST. He does not consider himself a fraud, but that he's still doing a service to people to make them feel better.

For being a man of God. Cotton is kind of an asshole. At one point he bets the head of the doc crew ten bucks that he can preach about anything; that even includes his mothers delicious banana nut bread. And he does so amazingly! I gotta admit, I kinda like Cotton. I like him because even though he looks like Matthew McConaughey, he seems to generally be convinced that possessions and exorcisms are bullshit and he's completely out to debunked these events. He's real and he's willing to fuck with peoples beliefs.

This leads him to Ivanwood, Louisiana, where a young girl named Nell is being terrorized. Cotton does his thing, performs a fake exorcism and collects his money and then goes on his way. This is when the real shit starts happening. Nell has always done drawings which says she dreams about, well she has a drawing of a dead cat, a man with a cross going into the fire, a cameraman with his head cut off and a woman chopped into pieces. One night as they are watching over Nell, Cotton and the film crew that is, she awakens and walks around with a camera and proceeds to beat a cat to death with it. You see where this is going?

During the course of the movie its revealed that Nell is pregnant which leads Cotton to still believe that what is happening to her is still physiological, because she lies about a boy who supposedly is the one who got her pregnant. But then turns out to be gay. The local priest from that area is brought in and lends his help with everything. While leaving the house Cotton is pulled by a sense of curiosity to find out why Nell lied. Upon his return they discover that the local priest is the head of a devil worshiping cult, Nell is on an alter and a some sort of creature is being pulled from her body and then is thrown into the fire that is crackling near them. The fire erupts into the night sky.

The doc crew urges Cotton that they should leave. Cotton hold his cross firmly and really begins to start praying for the first time in the entire movie. Did he get his faith back? He walks out with his cross held high, towards the flame. Pic #1, check. The woman and camera man run into the forrest and then the other two pictures are fulfilled. As soon as the cameraman's neck is sliced the camera falls to the ground, we get a static image of a rock and then SCENE!!!!! BLACK. OVER. CREDITS. FINITO.

Really? Your upset at this Ending? I was fucking relieved when it went black. For a movie like this that looks like every other exorcism movie out there, expect for the Paul Greengrass effect, I think it was really ballsy and a breath of fresh air to end it without knowing what happens next. It ended on a high. And in a movie like this that's the real fear; what happens next. The act of not knowing has always beem more terrifying that actually knowing.

For those of you who have seen the movie, the fire erupting is a little CGI-ish and having the movie end literally minutes from that point is a sign of not being put through another half hour where they could have possibly shown a very horrible looking CGI looking demon. I mean c'mon, you people woulda been fine with that? I know I wouldn't. Now I'm not saying that the movie is great, its a small simply film that you will most likely forget once you've had a post movie talk about it in the car with your friends. But I will say that the ending was something I wasn't really expecting and for that I appreciated what I saw a lot more than I would have, had the movie given me some sort of finite ending.


Dueces!
StuntmanBob

Machete Movie Review...Ah Fuck it, it was GREAT!

I remember my cousin Chris coming over when I was small to babysit my sister and I. Or more like watch, not babysit, cause you know I was never a baby, just a little man. More often than not he'd bring a movie over with him and one night it was Robert Rodriguez's Desperado.

I remember the guitar case full of guns. How mysterious and just badass it must be to walk around with one. The cool gun fights, the bad language and wanting to see the part where Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek just got it on like they were the last two people on the planet! I also remember not being able to see that part either. Sucked being little. But anyway from here on in, this was start of what I knew what I wanted to aspire to do with my life. Make movies.

But that's a whole other topic. We are here to talk Machete!

Machete was born in '07, out of a faux trailer, of the same name, that was part of RR and QT's Grindhouse collaboration; Planet Terror and Death Proof. And for all of you who are gushing over how great Machete is and you didn't see Grindhouse...SHAME ON YOU! You deserved to be violated in unholy places on your body by the blade of Machete.

So now three years later we are treated to a feature length film of that trailer. The movie begins in Mexico where Machete is out to save a missing girl from drug lord numero uno, Torrez, played masterfully by Steven Seagal. Torrez then makes Machete watch as he massacres his entire family and thus the bloody revenge of Machete begins. The back drop of this movie is the immigration issue that, some would say, plague this nation of ours. Machete, being a man who is solely out to get even with the people who wronged him, inadvertently becomes the face of this revolution.

Along the way we meet a dirty Senator, played by Robert De Niro, a hick border patrol guard played by Don Johnson, Jessica Alba who plays a conflicted immigration agent and Michelle Rodriguez who plays Luz a taco vendor who has connections to "She", a person who "gives the people what they want and fills their belly with something more than hate". Sound familiar?

From our trailer review both Dorian and myself were kinda worried about how the movie would eventually look and play out, given that so much of the trailer was dedicated to making it look like Joseph and the Technicolor Dream Coat threw up on itself. But I must say that all that hesitation was laid to rest. Aside from having an exploitative look at how this whole immigration thing might turn out, I was surprised to see that everyone in their roles was perfect! EVEN LINDSEY LOHAN!!!

There were a few parts that I kinda laughed at, and those were seeing Jessica Alba take up this militant leader role near the end of the film and the more I thought it about it, her delivery of it was perfect and it was meant to make us, the audience just go "OH GOD! that was corny," cause its meant to be that.

Hints of Rodriguez's Desperado were sprinkled everywhere. A scene in particular where men come to ambush Machete while he lays in bed with Alba was very reminiscent of the scene with Banderas and Hayek after their porn scene together. But these scenes work in the context of the movie, its not like they are just lazy throw in's. While Banderas was memorable in his execution of certain baddies. Alba takes the gold in a duel with a Luchador-mask wearing assassin. Much like Grindhouse, we are also treated to massive amounts of blood, gore, nudity, beheadings, and homemade weaponery (a la the weed-whack machete) to make this movie a literal crowd pleaser!

While I think Rodriguez gets the right amount of cred for his action and low budgets. No one really comments on the people he picks for his villains! Did you know to fund his first film El Mariachi, Rodriguez subjected himself to experimental drug trials for three months? For a fee of course; and the villain in El Mariachi was a guy he met during those trials? Pretty crazy right? But anyway, you have Joaquim De Almeida in Desperado, Johnny Depp and Willem Dafoe in Once Upon a Time in Mexico, Bruce Willis in Planet Terror and now Robert De Niro, Don Johnson and Mr. Steven Seagal.

Seagal is at the top of his chessy self in Machete. Calling people puneta's at the start of each conversation and hearing him call other's carnal and speak with a spanish accent was just magical to behold. I really hope Seagal shows up in other future Machete movies or just other Rodriguez/Tarantino movies cause he has definitely opened up something that I'm not ready to close yet with Machete.

I don't think I have to tell you that I enjoyed this movie. So just go fucking see it!


Dueces!
StuntmanBob

The Couch Episode 3: MACHETE

Our 3rd episode sees Bobby and Dorian heading to the Chicago Comic Con to talk about the trailer to Robert Rodriguez's MACHETE!


Enjoy
StuntmanBob